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| Garrin...wow you grew up fast! |
This week my first born graduates from the 8th grade. I'm full of mixed emotions. My first thought is "Wow...you grew up fast!" like lightening bolt fast. My dad told me that would happen! Like seriously, I should still be in high school! Second, did I do good enough? I think about these last years and wonder if I did enough to teach you to think for yourself, stand up for what you believe in, spend all the time I could with you, and the list goes on and on. Third, I think about you going to high school and all that brings. So I just pray that I did enough and that high school will be a great adventure that takes you to the next big adventure.
Life with 4 boys is fast and furious to say the least. It's more fun than "the law ought to allow" as my dad used to say. As well as the hardest gig I've ever had and it feels like it's all going by way too quickly! If I just didn't need sleep, maybe then just maybe I could do all that I want to do...but I need sleep, so I'll just trust that I'm doing the best I can at this time with what I've been given. That's all we can really do!
I do have a big missing piece, my dad! I wish he was here with us to see this and enjoy this ride like I am. I wish he was here so I could tell him, "You were right, dad, about everything!" I wish he was here to celebrate, to help guide me on this parenting of boys gig, to laugh (like only he could), to just give me a bear hug and tell me "You did good, kid!" I know he's here, I can feel him, but oh how I miss him. It's been 3 years since he left this earth and it has gone by fast. I wish he was here to give this son of mine, that he helped groom, wise words of advice like only he could. I just remember him always saying, "Life is short and nothing stays the same forever."
This boy has been amazing and so much fun to watch grow. I hope he always knows that I've done the best I know how and that I'll continue to do so til the day I die. I will soak up these next 4 years and enjoy watching him spread his wings. I will continue teaching him to think for himself, even though it seems it's not always like my thinking, and watch him take on the world. And yes that means that I'll KEEP ON KEEPIN ON!
